Ignoring Someone as Wrongful Speech
I am in an odd situation. Someone I know, who was my friend, now seems to have developped feelings towards me. I wish to give her space, but we are in contact electronically and text. She is extremely distraught by this situation. I cannot help but feel angry when she messages me, for various reasons. I feel that sometimes, the best answer for me is to remain silent. But in doing so, she feels ignored, and suffers.
What is the best course of action in a situation like this? Is ignoring someone wrong speech in this case?
right-speech
asked 2 hours ago
EggmanEggman
1,646514
add a comment |
I am in an odd situation. Someone I know, who was my friend, now seems to have developped feelings towards me. I wish to give her space, but we are in contact electronically and text. She is extremely distraught by this situation. I cannot help but feel angry when she messages me, for various reasons. I feel that sometimes, the best answer for me is to remain silent. But in doing so, she feels ignored, and suffers.
What is the best course of action in a situation like this? Is ignoring someone wrong speech in this case?
right-speech
asked 2 hours ago
EggmanEggman
1,646514
add a comment |
I am in an odd situation. Someone I know, who was my friend, now seems to have developped feelings towards me. I wish to give her space, but we are in contact electronically and text. She is extremely distraught by this situation. I cannot help but feel angry when she messages me, for various reasons. I feel that sometimes, the best answer for me is to remain silent. But in doing so, she feels ignored, and suffers.
What is the best course of action in a situation like this? Is ignoring someone wrong speech in this case?
right-speech
asked 2 hours ago
EggmanEggman
1,646514
I am in an odd situation. Someone I know, who was my friend, now seems to have developped feelings towards me. I wish to give her space, but we are in contact electronically and text. She is extremely distraught by this situation. I cannot help but feel angry when she messages me, for various reasons. I feel that sometimes, the best answer for me is to remain silent. But in doing so, she feels ignored, and suffers.
What is the best course of action in a situation like this? Is ignoring someone wrong speech in this case?
right-speech
right-speech
asked 2 hours ago
EggmanEggman
1,646514
asked 2 hours ago
EggmanEggman
1,646514
asked 2 hours ago
EggmanEggman
1,646514
asked 2 hours ago
EggmanEggman
1,646514
asked 2 hours ago
EggmanEggman
1,646514
1,646514
add a comment |
add a comment |
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
As a Buddhist, your boundaries & conduct in relationship should be clearly communicated. Just be honest with her.
answered 1 hour ago
DhammadhatuDhammadhatu
25.2k11044
add a comment |
One might ignore this answers message, so be careful here!
Another try in Alice in wonderland, feeling disturbed by Alice, to excuse by asking others to confirm the votes of defilements?
Even your question here might be wrong speech, Humpty Dumpty. A good name by the way. Caught by the tricks of defilements.
If someone sends you advertising, saying "come, make a trade for it", and one knows that it would no trade for long term happiness, would he take the offer?
It's of course wrong speech (giving signs) to simply keep "others warm" thinking: " I might lose an opportunity to gain", fearing "If I show signs not going into this certain deal, he/she might stop offer at all and he/she could posssible offer this or that later on if thinking I am interested in trade."
That is why honesty comes before keeping up relations, Silas are not lower as pleasant dwelling like sheep .
On the other hand, one needs to be careful that defilement do not misuse this understanding as well. Thought of the Uposatha of the wolf. Difficult. And easy if honest to oneself first, but that is the difficult part.
See him falling from his wall?
How may good did you already tried to "kill" by ignoring it (them)? Many "Buddhists" are using abstain from giving signs as signs and as one is able to "kill trolls" one might "kill sages" by same means. Now this is not really breaking the silas (as outwardly rules) but much heavier, kamma by mind and even very deceitful.
Best wishes by an karuna, defilement's Jabberwocky
{Note: not given for trade, exchange, stackes... but only for liberation and bounds toward only this}
answered 2 hours ago
Samana JohannSamana Johann
11
New contributor
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
add a comment |
Your Answer
StackExchange.ready(function() {
var channelOptions = {
tags: "".split(" "),
id: "565"
};
initTagRenderer("".split(" "), "".split(" "), channelOptions);
StackExchange.using("externalEditor", function() {
// Have to fire editor after snippets, if snippets enabled
if (StackExchange.settings.snippets.snippetsEnabled) {
StackExchange.using("snippets", function() {
createEditor();
});
}
else {
createEditor();
}
});
function createEditor() {
StackExchange.prepareEditor({
heartbeatType: 'answer',
autoActivateHeartbeat: false,
convertImagesToLinks: false,
noModals: true,
showLowRepImageUploadWarning: true,
reputationToPostImages: null,
bindNavPrevention: true,
postfix: "",
imageUploader: {
brandingHtml: "Powered by u003ca class="icon-imgur-white" href="https://imgur.com/"u003eu003c/au003e",
contentPolicyHtml: "User contributions licensed under u003ca href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/"u003ecc by-sa 3.0 with attribution requiredu003c/au003e u003ca href="https://stackoverflow.com/legal/content-policy"u003e(content policy)u003c/au003e",
allowUrls: true
},
noCode: true, onDemand: true,
discardSelector: ".discard-answer"
,immediatelyShowMarkdownHelp:true
});
}
});
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
StackExchange.ready(
function () {
StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fbuddhism.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f31414%2fignoring-someone-as-wrongful-speech%23new-answer', 'question_page');
}
);
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
As a Buddhist, your boundaries & conduct in relationship should be clearly communicated. Just be honest with her.
answered 1 hour ago
DhammadhatuDhammadhatu
25.2k11044
add a comment |
As a Buddhist, your boundaries & conduct in relationship should be clearly communicated. Just be honest with her.
answered 1 hour ago
DhammadhatuDhammadhatu
25.2k11044
add a comment |
As a Buddhist, your boundaries & conduct in relationship should be clearly communicated. Just be honest with her.
answered 1 hour ago
DhammadhatuDhammadhatu
25.2k11044
As a Buddhist, your boundaries & conduct in relationship should be clearly communicated. Just be honest with her.
answered 1 hour ago
DhammadhatuDhammadhatu
25.2k11044
answered 1 hour ago
DhammadhatuDhammadhatu
25.2k11044
answered 1 hour ago
DhammadhatuDhammadhatu
25.2k11044
answered 1 hour ago
DhammadhatuDhammadhatu
25.2k11044
25.2k11044
add a comment |
add a comment |
One might ignore this answers message, so be careful here!
Another try in Alice in wonderland, feeling disturbed by Alice, to excuse by asking others to confirm the votes of defilements?
Even your question here might be wrong speech, Humpty Dumpty. A good name by the way. Caught by the tricks of defilements.
If someone sends you advertising, saying "come, make a trade for it", and one knows that it would no trade for long term happiness, would he take the offer?
It's of course wrong speech (giving signs) to simply keep "others warm" thinking: " I might lose an opportunity to gain", fearing "If I show signs not going into this certain deal, he/she might stop offer at all and he/she could posssible offer this or that later on if thinking I am interested in trade."
That is why honesty comes before keeping up relations, Silas are not lower as pleasant dwelling like sheep .
On the other hand, one needs to be careful that defilement do not misuse this understanding as well. Thought of the Uposatha of the wolf. Difficult. And easy if honest to oneself first, but that is the difficult part.
See him falling from his wall?
How may good did you already tried to "kill" by ignoring it (them)? Many "Buddhists" are using abstain from giving signs as signs and as one is able to "kill trolls" one might "kill sages" by same means. Now this is not really breaking the silas (as outwardly rules) but much heavier, kamma by mind and even very deceitful.
Best wishes by an karuna, defilement's Jabberwocky
{Note: not given for trade, exchange, stackes... but only for liberation and bounds toward only this}
answered 2 hours ago
Samana JohannSamana Johann
11
New contributor
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
add a comment |
One might ignore this answers message, so be careful here!
Another try in Alice in wonderland, feeling disturbed by Alice, to excuse by asking others to confirm the votes of defilements?
Even your question here might be wrong speech, Humpty Dumpty. A good name by the way. Caught by the tricks of defilements.
If someone sends you advertising, saying "come, make a trade for it", and one knows that it would no trade for long term happiness, would he take the offer?
It's of course wrong speech (giving signs) to simply keep "others warm" thinking: " I might lose an opportunity to gain", fearing "If I show signs not going into this certain deal, he/she might stop offer at all and he/she could posssible offer this or that later on if thinking I am interested in trade."
That is why honesty comes before keeping up relations, Silas are not lower as pleasant dwelling like sheep .
On the other hand, one needs to be careful that defilement do not misuse this understanding as well. Thought of the Uposatha of the wolf. Difficult. And easy if honest to oneself first, but that is the difficult part.
See him falling from his wall?
How may good did you already tried to "kill" by ignoring it (them)? Many "Buddhists" are using abstain from giving signs as signs and as one is able to "kill trolls" one might "kill sages" by same means. Now this is not really breaking the silas (as outwardly rules) but much heavier, kamma by mind and even very deceitful.
Best wishes by an karuna, defilement's Jabberwocky
{Note: not given for trade, exchange, stackes... but only for liberation and bounds toward only this}
answered 2 hours ago
Samana JohannSamana Johann
11
New contributor
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
add a comment |
One might ignore this answers message, so be careful here!
Another try in Alice in wonderland, feeling disturbed by Alice, to excuse by asking others to confirm the votes of defilements?
Even your question here might be wrong speech, Humpty Dumpty. A good name by the way. Caught by the tricks of defilements.
If someone sends you advertising, saying "come, make a trade for it", and one knows that it would no trade for long term happiness, would he take the offer?
It's of course wrong speech (giving signs) to simply keep "others warm" thinking: " I might lose an opportunity to gain", fearing "If I show signs not going into this certain deal, he/she might stop offer at all and he/she could posssible offer this or that later on if thinking I am interested in trade."
That is why honesty comes before keeping up relations, Silas are not lower as pleasant dwelling like sheep .
On the other hand, one needs to be careful that defilement do not misuse this understanding as well. Thought of the Uposatha of the wolf. Difficult. And easy if honest to oneself first, but that is the difficult part.
See him falling from his wall?
How may good did you already tried to "kill" by ignoring it (them)? Many "Buddhists" are using abstain from giving signs as signs and as one is able to "kill trolls" one might "kill sages" by same means. Now this is not really breaking the silas (as outwardly rules) but much heavier, kamma by mind and even very deceitful.
Best wishes by an karuna, defilement's Jabberwocky
{Note: not given for trade, exchange, stackes... but only for liberation and bounds toward only this}
answered 2 hours ago
Samana JohannSamana Johann
11
New contributor
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
One might ignore this answers message, so be careful here!
Another try in Alice in wonderland, feeling disturbed by Alice, to excuse by asking others to confirm the votes of defilements?
Even your question here might be wrong speech, Humpty Dumpty. A good name by the way. Caught by the tricks of defilements.
If someone sends you advertising, saying "come, make a trade for it", and one knows that it would no trade for long term happiness, would he take the offer?
It's of course wrong speech (giving signs) to simply keep "others warm" thinking: " I might lose an opportunity to gain", fearing "If I show signs not going into this certain deal, he/she might stop offer at all and he/she could posssible offer this or that later on if thinking I am interested in trade."
That is why honesty comes before keeping up relations, Silas are not lower as pleasant dwelling like sheep .
On the other hand, one needs to be careful that defilement do not misuse this understanding as well. Thought of the Uposatha of the wolf. Difficult. And easy if honest to oneself first, but that is the difficult part.
See him falling from his wall?
How may good did you already tried to "kill" by ignoring it (them)? Many "Buddhists" are using abstain from giving signs as signs and as one is able to "kill trolls" one might "kill sages" by same means. Now this is not really breaking the silas (as outwardly rules) but much heavier, kamma by mind and even very deceitful.
Best wishes by an karuna, defilement's Jabberwocky
{Note: not given for trade, exchange, stackes... but only for liberation and bounds toward only this}
answered 2 hours ago
Samana JohannSamana Johann
11
New contributor
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
edited 1 hour ago
answered 2 hours ago
Samana JohannSamana Johann
11
New contributor
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
answered 2 hours ago
Samana JohannSamana Johann
11
answered 2 hours ago
Samana JohannSamana Johann
11
11
New contributor
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
New contributor
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
Samana Johann is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
add a comment |
add a comment |
Thanks for contributing an answer to Buddhism Stack Exchange!
- Please be sure to answer the question. Provide details and share your research!
But avoid …
- Asking for help, clarification, or responding to other answers.
- Making statements based on opinion; back them up with references or personal experience.
To learn more, see our tips on writing great answers.
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
StackExchange.ready(
function () {
StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fbuddhism.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f31414%2fignoring-someone-as-wrongful-speech%23new-answer', 'question_page');
}
);
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
